Hey from Japan- or wherever the moving van arrives- Emily Cannell

I now know the true reason van Gogh cut off his ear for the Clampitts recently faced similar circumstances.

A well-intentioned van Gogh signed on to a group tour of the South of France in order to divine inspiration from the picturesque surroundings. Upon arrival he discovered the only way to enjoy the bucolic setting without having to listen to the woman next to him complain about her hemorrhoids was to cut off his ear. After the removing the ear, he was still able to hear the screaming of the kids forced to participate but too young to be without an afternoon nap and a bottle as the listening part of the ear was still in tact. He then stuffed his ear canal with cotton and covered it with gauze. This was not enough to drown out the prattle of the tour guide determined to impart 1500 years worth of…

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